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Posts Tagged ‘stay at home’

Struggling–and Learning–During the COVID-19 Pandemic

April 7th, 2020

“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” –Viktor Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning

First, I want to say how sorry I am to any of you who have suffered the loss of a loved one, or loved ones, as a result of the COVID-19 coronavirus. I can only imagine the pain you’re experiencing and I’m so very sorry. 

And second, if you’re sick with coronavirus or know someone who is, I’m keeping you in my heart and thoughts during this time and pray for your recovery.

Also, I want to thank all of the health care workers and first responders who are on the very front lines, working to help people fight and hopefully overcome the virus. There are no words that can adequately express my gratitude and admiration for these compassionate humans, who when they go to work risk not only their own lives but the lives of their families.

One of the most heartbreaking realities of coronavirus is that when a person dies from coronavirus, he/she dies alone. For their own safety–to protect their own health and the health of all they come into contact with, loved ones are not allowed to see them or be with them at their end. I am so thankful for the many compassionate health care workers who are often there to hold the hand of and/or sit alongside the person as he or she takes their last breath and passes. Can you imagine what a difference that must make? It is heartwrenching to think of a loved one dying alone. These health care workers who are with them when they pass are truly Angels.

Thank you to all of the “essential” workers who are risking their health by going to work so life may still go on for those of us who get to remain in the safety of our homes. 

Speaking of working for the greater good, the time has come for us to take responsibility for one another. I hope you’ll read this blog post that includes important wisdom from writer Sebastian Junger.

I know I am not unique when I say the COVID-19 pandemic has disrupted every aspect of my life. In fact, everyone I know, coach and work with is being impacted in a myriad of ways by the pandemic. And in this story, I’ll share several examples from a wide range of people I know to illustrate how the pandemic is challenging–and teaching–us. Maybe you’ll relate to what others are experiencing.

Personally, if I were to choose two words to describe how I’m feeling as a result of the COVID-19 pandemic, the words would be worried and disoriented. What I’m being reminded of, and learning as a result of my worry and disorientation is that in life there is so much we can’t control. I need to do my part to help the public and to focus on the things I can control. I need to thoughtfully respond, rather than mindlessly react, to all that unfolds during the pandemic. These things are easier said than done, but I’m trying.

As a life and leadership coach, I’m always in search of powerful questions that I can ask people. I love coming up with questions that require reflection and that are likely to provide insights. We learn more from our challenges and hardships than we do from our successes. I have tried to remember this personally by asking myself, whenever I’m struggling through a challenge, “What will I make of this?” Doing this has been a difference-maker in my life because it turns the process of struggle into something constructive. It forces me to look for the lessons and silver linings (ponies) during a time when I could easily default to playing the victim and be a complainer who looks for and finds, all the things that are unfair, hard and/or wrong. But don’t just take my word for it. The late Viktor Frankl survived three years in Nazi concentration camps. After surviving that experience he wrote a book, Man’s Search for Meaning, which has been one of the most influential books I’ve read. In it, Frankl reminds us that no matter how bad our circumstances are, we have the power and ability to choose how we will respond to them. Having this ability saved Frankl’s life.

In that spirit, I’ve been asking family, friends, coaching clients and acquaintances a variety of questions, but the following two are my favorites at this stage of the pandemic:

What’s the most difficult thing you’re experiencing as a result of the COVID-19 pandemic? And, what are you learning from the difficulty?

Many people have been generous enough to share their responses to these questions with me, and I’ve included their responses below. NOTE: I included many of the contributions, but couldn’t fit them all, so if you shared your responses with me and they aren’t included in this blog post, I’m sorry. Please know it’s because I couldn’t add any more to this already-too-long post.

(By the way, I encourage you to ask these same questions of yourself and those in your families and circles of friends. Reflecting on and discussing these questions will help you to be intentional and optimistic during what is otherwise a challenging and uncertain time for all of us.)

Kathy, Lander, WY: Kathy said the most difficult thing she is experiencing during the COVID-19 pandemic is knowing that she’s part of the at-risk population, which means she is among the 20% that could end up in the hospital if she contracts the virus. A mother, she said the thought of death doesn’t scare her as much as the thought of leaving her children without their mom. “As a mom, this is one of the most terrifying prospects you can face,” she said, adding, “I was faced with this recently when I went through breast cancer treatment.” She said during her cancer treatments, she was too tired and busy to get her affairs in order. Now she has the time so she’s doing just that and she said it will help her sleep better at night. As a result of her low immunity, Kathy has been quarantined from my children for a month, which is very difficult. “I keep seeing families walking around the neighborhood and photos on Facebook of families playing games together. I miss my children so much.  When times are scary I like the comfort of them sleeping under the same roof.” She said she also misses hugs. However, these difficulties are reminding and teaching her that she’s not in control. “We can hope for the best and prepare for the worst, the rest is up to God. I wake up every day excited and happy that I am here,” she said.

Tina, Rifle, CO: Tina’s daughter works in health care and she worries about her safety. Tina said it is also hard to not be near her mom, who lives alone, during this concerning time. This difficulty is teaching her to breathe deeply, think positive thoughts and pray, and to trust and allow others to step in to help where/when she can’t.

Julie, Lander, WY: The hardest thing for Julie is the uncertainty about what’s going to happen. A middle school principal, she has had to develop an online learning system in short order. She wants to make sure her students can adapt and continue to learn with the new format for learning. She said she misses seeing students and staff and is constantly wondering if they are all okay. Julie added that she’s worried about her sister, who works in healthcare, and her mother, who lives by herself. “I have never been much of a phone person but I have learned that I am enjoying reaching out to family and friends to connect,” she said.

Mark, Lander, WY: Mark, a pastor, said the hardest thing for him during this pandemic is not being able to help more people in more ways. He said the difficulty of not being able to be of more help to more people is teaching him patience and persistence.  

Judi, Lander, WY: Her biggest challenge is missing her children and grandchildren and not being able to with them during this concerning time. Her daughter lives in Amsterdam, and her son and his family live on the East Coast. She dreams of getting in her old, high mileage Prius, laying out the back seat to make a very uncomfortable bed, doing a parking lot pick up of groceries at her local market, and heading to the East Coast where she’d quarantine herself for 14 days and then move in with her son and his family. Then, post-pandemic, she’d catch the first flight available to visit her daughter in Amsterdam. She is grateful her mother is near here through this and they recently celebrated a socially-distanced 92nd birthday party for her mom’s husband.  The positive impact of the pandemic is it is helping her to get a more clear picture of what she wants her life to look like in the future. It has confirmed for her that the most important thing she wants to do post-pandemic is to spend quality time with her kids and grandkids while they’re still young. She hopes to spend a big part of next winter on the East Coast, going to her grandkids programs, swim meets, etc.

Anne, Lander, WY: Anne said it’s frustrating and hard to not be able to find toilet paper, flour, and yeast. She added the uncertainty of when the pandemic will be behind us is particularly hard. Anne said before the pandemic she considered herself mentally strong. Now, she’s not so sure. “It feels like I’m on a plane (I don’t like flying) that has turbulence and there is no arrival time. I can’t just tell myself to stick it out for another 30 minutes and then it will be over because, in all reality, we don’t know how long this will last,” she said. One of the things this difficult time is teaching Anne is to have more empathy for those who live in poverty and are unable to get their most essential needs fulfilled during “normal” times. And, she added, the silver linings are a slower pace and time together as a family. She is hoping this experience will inspire us as a society to re-think the education model and the pace at which we live.

Gerta, Troy, MI: Gerta said the most difficult thing she is experiencing is being near the end of her pregnancy. Her baby is due in about three weeks but could arrive any day. She said her support system is limited to her husband (who’s been great), “but a gal needs her mother and her best friends, too,” she said. Only her husband will be allowed in the delivery room, and her mother likely won’t get to hold her first granddaughter for who knows how long. In addition, Gerta said she worries about bringing a baby into a contaminated world, and the associated risk gets the best of her some days. She added that she has a new appreciation for things she took for granted before the pandemic–simple things, such as going out for dinner, that she is now not able to enjoy with her husband. As a result, at 39 weeks pregnant, Gerta is cooking three meals a day. “We’re taking all these measures with our family’s best interests in mind, but it doesn’t make it easier. I have learned, though, that what really matters is our loved one’s health and safety,” she said. Gerta added that seeing her parents on FaceTime has never made her so happy, and hearing a friend’s voice and that they are well, has never felt more fulfilling. “And waking up every morning with my husband being able to work from home and be safe, has never meant so much as it does now,” she said.

Amanda, Saratoga, CA: Amanda said she is sad. “I am absolutely heartbroken for my daughter. She’s 17 and has worked so hard since middle school and throughout high school to maintain a 4+ GPA and was looking forward to all the capstone celebrations of her teenage years. In a matter of weeks, she has had her entire world collapse—her last competition season was cancelled, no senior rally, no prom, no graduation or grad night party, no senior trip, and she will not go back to school or have any closure at all on her time spent in high school.” Her daughter can’t even see her friends for support through all of this, and that is hard. Amanda added that her daughter is in the process of deciding which college she’ll attend in the fall, and yet is unable to travel and make any college campus visits, not to mention there is a lurking doubt as to whether or not she’ll even be able to move into the freshman dorms or if she’ll start college via remote learning. “What am I learning? I’m not there yet,” said Amanda. “I’m just so sad and sad for what she’ll never be able to experience from a very important time in her youth.”

Leann, Lander, WY: Leann shared that during the pandemic, she has been struggling with her lack of control and the loss of everyday freedom of choice. The feeling of no control was amplified recently when an extended family member of Leann’s tested positive for Coronavirus. She said people have always been important to her, and now, with social distancing constraints in place, she values her relationships even more. She is learning from these difficulties, though, and one of the things she’s learning is to be more patient and to slow down. She is also communicating in different, and additional ways, with family and friends. She is finding that her anxiety about the lack of control brought forth by COVID-19 is lessened when she talks with other people because she is reminded of, and finds comfort in, the fact none of us is alone in this. She also says she appreciates the sharing of thoughts and prayers for one another. 

Alan, Malibu, CA: Alan said until the COVID-19 pandemic, he was using the beautiful time he had to connect with people, not only people in his existing circle but the new people in his life. He loves to travel and take in live music, and pre-pandemic, attended many shows, concerts and music festivals. He said at first having so much free time was hard, but he’s been intentionally investing the newfound time in exercise, spirituality and nature. He has replaced some of his passions, including skiing and Yoga, with online yoga, Zoom dance parties, online meditation, etc., which helps, “but is no substitute.” Alan said the people in his life and the connections he makes with new and interesting people are his oxygen. “It’s what I do to live,” he said. “These in-person experiences with others have been short-circuited by the pandemic, and I’m starving for them.” Alan said while the technology is great for staying in contact with the people in one’s life, “it feels like being on a ventilator for me.” As a result, he said he’s surviving, but not living like he’d like to be. He is looking forward to making up for lost time and seeing the people he misses once this pandemic is behind us.  

Julie, Lander, WY: I heard the word “surreal” used to describe this time, and it fits my experience. Personally, I’m hardly affected. I love being home with my husband/best friend, walking or biking, working in the yard, discovering new food combinations from my stash of aspirational grocery purchases. Extra fun chats with our kids, silly or sweet, are a treat. But when I look beyond my own life and this present moment, the surreal hits: Desperate health care workers, sick people fighting for breath, small businesses facing insurmountable losses, and a country struggling to figure this crisis out in real time. And all I can do to help is stay home. “And part of the weirdness is that we are all well, but any of us could already have it (Coronavirus) and be gone in a short time,” she said, but never before have we had to confront or mortality so directly. 

Diane, Lander, WY: Diane says living in rural Wyoming, where her nearest non-family neighbors are 2-1/2 miles away, makes social distancing workable. She said it’s helpful and comforting to go for drives, to see people in moving vehicles and on the other side of glass when she does need to enter a business.  Diane said the pandemic is reminding her to be grateful for her home, the ability to heat her home, having electricity, having a washer and dryer, and the items that are necessary for her to cook, bake, eat and meet her most basic needs. This difficult and uncertain time is also helping her to learn to be more patient.

Jerry, Wichita, KS:  Jerry said the most difficult part of the pandemic are the uncaring and non-understanding people who give him snide looks for wearing a mask and who are impatient with him when he tries to maintain 6’ of distance. Jerry said that in January, he learned he has Interstitial Lung Disease (more specifically, Idiopathic Pulmonary Fibrosis), which is progressive and causes fibrosis in his lungs, is irreversible and has no cure–other than lung transplants. He said any damage caused to his lungs by COVID-19 would probably be fatal. “What others don’t know is that my lungs are already damaged and a bug like COVID-19 can kill me,” he said. Jerry said it’s also difficult knowing that so many people are hoarding supplies that many people need and cannot obtain, such as toilet paper, alcohol, wipes, and masks. He said he’s learning to wash his groceries before putting them away, to carry and use alcohol wipes before touching his steering wheel, and he now uses a pencil or his pinky finger knuckle to touch buttons (elevators and keypads), and puts on gloves before getting out of the car to refuel, and above all, washes or sterilize his hands before touching his face. Lastly, Jerry said he’s learning which of his friends really understand his condition. They keep their distance, elbow bump as a greeting, and understand when he is wearing a mask or using oxygen. Jerry emphasized how grateful he is to have an understanding wife who is willing to run the day-to-day errands he cannot while keeping up with the paperwork necessary to manage his case.

Sharon, Lander, WY: Sharon said it’s difficult to name just a single hard thing during this time because the list of all that’s difficult is longer than one.  She’s had to visit the babies in her family from a distance, despite the fact they live in the same small town. “How do you not touch and squeeze them?” she asked. Sharon, the “errand runner” during this time, worries about inadvertently passing deadly germs along to her 75-year-old husband who has Parkinson’s Disease.  A teacher and educational facilitator, Sharon said she misses walking down the hallways to pick up students to bring them back to her room for reading instruction. “That freedom to freely move about amongst people is being terribly missed,” she said. Another challenge for Sharon is the likelihood that her summer trip will be cancelled. It is a dream trip that includes a hiking/biking trip with friends in Austria, in and around Salzburg, and a trip to London and Scotland with her husband. “I’ve been dreaming and arranging this trip since last October. It’s a thrill to page through guidebooks and online sites planning out an itinerary of dreams. Now, I keep wondering, ‘Will we get to go?;” And yet, if the trip is a Go, she is wondering about the safety of going.  She said a friend recently caused her to question whether flying with 200+ people on an airplane for several hours, following this virus, will be sensible. Sharon said the pandemic is teaching her to think smaller and consider more local cycling and camping trips. “They do not have the same allure, at the moment, of traipsing up and down through the Austrian Alps or the Scottish Highlands, but my fantasies seem to be on hold for the time being. And it’s killing me.” But all that said, Sharon added that the difficulties of this time are helping her to appreciate even more the fact that she’s able to dream up and take such trips in the first place. She said that she thinks often about the billions of people on the planet who have far more to be concerned about than she does.

Pavani, Atlanta, GA: Pavani is the mother of two young children and she is finding it hard to not know when her parents will be able to cuddle her children again. She also worries about her sister, and brother-in-law, who are expecting their first child in the coming weeks. This is especially a concern because her brother-in-law is a doctor working with COVID patients. Pavani said she also wonders if humanity will learn something from this and snap out of its growth and consumption-based culture. She worries that the COVID experience could prompt a generation of fearful isolation. Pavani said there are some positive impacts the pandemic is having on her. She is getting better at slowing down and savoring simple moments in daily daily life such as cooking and cleaning. She’s able to find joy in these things now, whereas before the pandemic she viewed them as chores. Pavani said her relationships with her husband and children are stronger as a result of experiencing the pandemic together. COVID-19 is also reminding her that they’ll be okay, and even joyful, despite the fact they’re losing income as a result of her husband being furloughed at work. Pavani explained that the hardship is helping them gain clarity about what is most important, which will help to inform their life, post-pandemic. The whole experience “reaffirms that we can live differently and with less “stuff,” and that touch, love and community matter so much.,” she said.

Christine, Lander, WY: The most challenging part for Christine is the federal government’s response to the crisis, and living alone and missing being with “living, breathing humans.” She’s learning that she isn’t as much of an introvert as she thought was, and she’s realizing how much we need human connection. She added that while Zoom video calls help, they’re not the same as being with and connecting with people in person.

Lisa, Newberg, OR: Lisa works at a retirement/assisted living facility and she said the hardest part about the pandemic is the anxiety she has about potentially infecting someone at her place of work. “I worry that if one person there gets it, it will spread to many and I love all these people,” she said. She added that she’s nervous about the reverse happening as well. Because she is still required to go to work and can’t socially distance herself while at work, she worries she’ll get the virus and bring it home to her family. What she is learning and appreciating is how much the elderly people appreciate having someone who is there with them during this time when other visitors aren’t allowed.

Lori, Laramie, WY: Lori said that the hardest thing during the pandemic is missing the warmth and love and closeness of her dear friends that she experiences when she can physically be with them. She lives alone, and even though she’s an introvert, Lori said she misses her sisters and the feeling of deep connection she experiences when they can all be together. She also misses being able to go to the gym where she feels a sense of connection and community. Lori added that she feels heartbroken and concerned for all of those who are suffering directly from Coronavirus and the risks to their health and life. The challenges that come with the pandemic are teaching Lori “to slow down, enjoy the peace of silence, and to be grateful for every day I wake up feeling healthy, warm, well-fed, and happily, gainfully employed.”

Mike, Lander, WY: Mike is an owner and partner in Maven, an online retailer of outdoor equipment. Seemingly, Mike said, Maven is structured to deal with many of the issues that are now realities in this time of the COVID-19 pandemic. Most of Maven’s customers purchase from its website and they don’t have a large retail space, but “a small showroom in a small town,” said Mike. The company’s team of 7 people can do most of their work remotely from their homes, and the company’s 5,000-square-foot facility can house one person shipping and receiving and two or three of us working in a personal-distancing separate space. Despite this, Mike acknowledged that the company is taking some “big hits” as a result of the slowing down-to-stopping of its supply chain of goods from Japan and the Philippines. Add to that, Maven’s assembly facility in California shut down with less than 24 hours notice, removing their ability to make custom-built optics. In addition, the last month of the spring show season was completely cancelled, which shut down a very important revenue stream for Maven. So there is a lot of difficulty. Yet their store is not closed and they’re still open for business. And although the quarantine and stay-at-home orders provide more time for people to shop online, who has the funds? Mike acknowledged that given over 6 million people are now seeking unemployment, it’s less likely people will be spending money on non-essential products. He said he thinks the company will survive but wonders if that will be enough. The biggest challenge for Mike is being able to see the light and the opportunities. “I am a team person,” he said. “I thrive on a small group of people motivated by challenge, by a goal. We have a collaborative leadership team. Three guys who steer and drive our organization. We are team CEOs, making all the big decisions and setting the tone and flavor of our brand.  In normal days we gather almost every day to put our brains together and make things happen. In our 6 years of business, we have grown to be a force in the outdoor industry. People know who we are and that we are different, unique and disruptive to the hunting optics market. Now this team is itself disrupted,” Mike explained, which is particularly hard for him given he gets motivation and drive from this team. “It is so hard to drive forward each day without our normal collaboration, adding, “Survive we can, but can we thrive?” All that said, Mike said he’s learning. Thanks to technology, he and his team are able to use Google Hangout, Zoom, and Skype to see each other’s faces and hear each other’s voices, which is most helpful. Before COVID-19 using technology for collaboration and meetings occurred rarely, but now Mike said it’s the new norm. “We have learned that we can still be a team and that we can still bring our brains together even when not in the same room,” he said. Mike added that he has learned they can keep their team and grow in deep, fundamental ways that will make them stronger on the other side of the pandemic. “That is our daily conversation, and that drives the actions of all the members of our small Maven team,” explained Mike. “We will be better because we have found a way to grow through this challenging time.”

Erica, Laramie, WY: Erica said the hardest thing about the pandemic is the overreaction of so many people and their hoarding of everyday essentials, especially when so many, particularly the elderly, are in need of the supplies.  Erica said she also finds the media’s coverage and its tendency to focus on the negative, challenging. She wishes there would be more positive stories reported during this time. While she acknowledged the seriousness of this time, she wishes we’d hear more about the silver linings that are emerging as a result of COVID, such as more family time, sharing more meals as a family, and having more meaningful conversations with those we love. Erica added that this experience is an opportunity for her to lean more on her faith. “I gave myself to God and am trusting fully in his guidance.” 

Gayla, Lander, WY: Gayla said losing her independence is one of the most difficult aspects of the pandemic. She said she’s used to doing things her way and doesn’t like feeling helpless or having to rely on other people. “Now I have my grocery shopping completed by a total stranger, which I am so grateful for.” She said in order to protect her husband’s health and hers, they are following all of the COVID-19 guidelines and it helps that their two daughters are making sure they’re not taking risks. As a teacher, Gayla said there are many challenges. As a result of the pandemic and stay-at-home instruction, students’ learning has moved online, and during the time of year when students typically start understanding and making sense of the concepts they’ve been learning. She said this is also the time of year when students are more mature, and she’s able to make more personal connections. She said it’s also more difficult, via online learning, to inspire students to complete their assignments and get them turned in on time. Gayla said mostly she’s concerned about students being out of school for so long and the struggles they may be having with a new way to attend school and learn. On the upside, Gayla said the technology is enabling her to connect with her students, and “I am able to reassure them in these uncertain times.”

Jason, Atlanta, GA: The most difficult thing for Jason about the pandemic is the social distancing and the resulting lack of in-person human interaction, “which is where I receive my energy,” he said.  However, he added that the experience is making him appreciate multiple things like personal relationships, his freedoms, and the clarity it is providing about his life and how he spends his time.  

Karen, Farson, WY: Karen says the most difficult part of this experience is missing her elderly parents and not being able to be with them, and her fears that a family member will get sick. Before COVID-19, Karen would travel to see and help her parents on a weekly basis. The hardship of not being able to help her elderly parents is making her appreciate the fact that both of her parents are still living and that she is able to help them on a regular basis (when we’re not living in a time like this.) She is also grateful for her sister and daughter and the help they’re able to provide for her parents. 

Kathy, Casper, WY: Kathy said one of the most difficult aspects of this time is missing her child’s performances and events, including a once-in-a-lifetime high school choir trip with her daughter to Scotland that was canceled in late March.  She is appreciating having more time at home with her family, and more time to love on her pets. Kathy said she hopes the pandemic will inspire people to work on mending any fractured relationships since a time like this drives home the importance of the people and relationships in our life. She said she hopes that we’re all learning the value of slowing down and to not be overscheduled. She also hopes people will waste less time watching TV and staring at their screens as one’s life passes by.

Michelle, Lander, WY: Michelle said she concurs with what others have mentioned for difficulties while living during this pandemic. She said there are many positives too. “We are resilient,” she said. “We are pulling together to be innovative. We have the time to appreciate the simple things. We are enjoying LOTS of specific family time. We have incredible opportunities that were never available before to be immediately in contact and virtually face-to-face with our loved ones, coworkers, leaders, educators, and medical providers. We see others who can work tirelessly for us in professions we may not have appreciated before, but now recognize their value. We are recognizing that we have needs that should be addressed for the long term spiritually, personally, neighborhood/community-wise, statewide, nationally and globally. We are recognizing the need to be introspective and self-reliant, while still contributing to others.” She added that despite COVID-19, the sun still sets and rises, and while Winter isn’t quite finished in Wyoming, Spring was sprouting in her garden last weekend and Summer is on the way. “I have Faith, Love, and Hope,” she said.

Susan, Novato,CA:  Susan said she finds it hard to witness people who are disregarding the shelter-in-place and social distancing instructions since their actions put others at risk. She said she is discovering how much this lack of caring for humanity affects her. Susan added that she’s also learning that she may lack compassion for herself. “The world is a mirror,” she said. 

Sharon, Tucson, AZ: Sharon misses the Christian experience of sharing Holy Week and Easter gatherings with her church family. She says she is social and the time that we’re in makes her realize how much she misses being able to share dinner with friends or to enjoy a patio chat with them. Since she can’t get together with friends, she is grateful for the walks she can enjoy in the warmth of Arizona during this unsettling time. Sharon added that she worries for our country and world, and is reminded by the difficulties of this time of how grateful she is for all of those who are on working on the “front lines of this war.” 

Bralli, Lander, WY:  Bralli said the hardest part of the pandemic was not being able to hug her daughter when she recently arrived home from Spain and requiring her daughter to self-quarantine alone for two weeks in order to protect the rest of their family. In addition, Bralli said it’s hard to watch people she loves go to the frontlines every day, putting themselves and their families at risk. The pandemic experience has taught her that “we ALWAYS need to appreciate those people we love.”  

Holly, Lander, WY: The hardest part for Holly about the COVID-19 time is the worry and fear she is experiencing, and the loss of sleep that results. She misses her family, coworkers, and friends so much. What this difficulty is teaching her is to take it one day, or hour, or five minutes at a time and to remind herself that this too shall pass, and also, not take things for granted.

Rhonda, Golden, CO: Rhonda said she’s not normally an anxious person, but all of the uncertainty surrounding the pandemic is causing her anxiety.  She is particularly concerned for her husband, who works in healthcare, and her daughter-in-law, who is pregnant. She is also missing the family that is not nearby. Rhonda said through the difficulties, she is learning to take a deep breath and trust that it will all be okay.

Walter, Lander, WY: Walt said the most difficult aspect of the COVID pandemic is tolerating the people who don’t think or behave as if the pandemic is real. For example, he said when he went to fetch his mail from his mailbox this morning and while doing so, he ran into another man. The man remarked to him that COVID-19 is a hoax. Walt said the man tried approaching to continue talking with him and Walt had to keep backing away to keep the six feet between them. Still, the man persisted and kept trying to approach him. Finally, Walt had to tell him to stop. Walt said the ignorance and actions of such people “will cause deaths!” He said he’s learning “that people will not believe anything that is contrary to their ill-held beliefs no matter how solid the facts are.” 

Vickie, Lander, WY: The hardest thing for Vicki is finding a new routine. Vickie said she is having to push herself out of her comfort zone and the silver lining to this is it has opened her up to new opportunities.  Before COVID, she would attend Yoga 2 times a week, but being required to stay at home has inspired her to get online and start doing Pilates and strength training. In addition, she’s taking more walks. This increased activity is a direct result of being required to stay home during COVID, and has inspired her to be not only more active, but also more resourceful than she was before.

Hal, Wichita, KS: Hals said the hardest thing about the pandemic is “sifting through various news media to determine what is true, what is utter BS, and what falls somewhere in the middle.” Another difficulty for Hal is “observing dishonesty, incompetence, and stupidity to the highest degree when many lives are in the balance, and understanding why seemingly intelligent people are buying and defending it for selfish reasons.” He said he’s learning the importance of voting and encouraging others to vote–especially young people, “whose world is being affected by what I feel are reckless, selfish criminals. I’m learning to accept my own views and not fret over what other people think of me.” To help relieve the anxiety he is experiencing, he adopted a 6-month-old kitten, Rusty, from a woman who lost her job and couldn’t afford to have the kitten fixed and vaccinated. Hal said the kitten reinforces the importance of caring, and “is warding off invisible zombies every night, and makes me thankful for what I have.”

Katie, Phoenix, AZ: Katie said she is struggling with the fact she has all this time that has been given to her and yet she can’t spend it visiting her mother, who lives in a different town. “It feels like a wasted opportunity,” she explained. COVID 19 is inspiring her to want to talk to her mom more often and to visit her more often once the pandemic is over. In addition to not being able to visit her mom right now, Katie said she misses the ability to go to the gym and that she doesn’t feel as mentally strong or healthy as she normally does. She shared that when she broke her leg a while back, she was sedentary for 4.5 months. When she made it through the rehabilitation of her knee, she was able to get back in top shape. “I have to remember that my body will recover from this, too,” she said. 

Debbie, Casper, WY: Debbie said her biggest challenge has been watching others that are not taking this pandemic seriously. She has a daughter in the healthcare industry who is due to have a baby any day. Debbie is worried about her 12-year-old grandson, who is a leukemia survivor and currently has mono and asthma. Debbie is concerned for the elderly, who are so dear to her. “I continue to learn from them every day of my life,” she said. As a result of her concerns, Debbie said she and her family have been adhering to social distancing. “I could not live with myself if I was the reason for someone getting COVID-19,” she said. Debbie’s mantra is “Together we are stronger,” and she is optimistic that we’ll get through the pandemic, despite the economic downturn. But, she added, the key will be to care for one another.

Thank you for stopping by and for reading my blog. I’m wishing you and yours good health and optimism during this trying time.

Feel free to please contribute your own responses to the two questions, (What’s the most difficult thing you’re experiencing as a result of the COVID-19 pandemic? And, What is the difficulty teaching you?) in the comments or in an email you send to me.

Related (COVID-19)blog posts:

A Thank You Note to the Helpers

Always Look for the Pony

The Time Has Come for Us to Take Responsibility for One Another